Offering Healing After Abortion
Clyde C. Besson
A friend recently said to me “I have never heard anyone in any church teach or preach about emotional healing after an abortion.” I began to think about her statement and asked myself why we in the church do not address this needed healing for those who have experienced an abortion. I came to the conclusion that it is easier to hold a sign condemning abortion, scream obstinacies, and choose hatred and violence rather than to walk beside a woman or a family who has experienced this pain and offer healing. Maybe we are afraid we will be viewed as approving of abortion. Jesus condemned all sin, but never stopped loving the person. In God’s eyes there are no little and big sins. All sin is sin. There is not any sin that is beyond God’s forgiveness and healing.
Through my counseling ministry, with God’s leadership, I have personally assisted a number of men and women through this healing process. Through this I have learned several things. Usually the person who has experienced an abortion feels shame, anger, and guilt, often accompanied with depression. God has given me an exercise that has helped many find healing. After counseling and at the appropriate time I suggest to the person I’m working with that we go through an exercise that facilitates healing. Let me share it with you. I am going to take you through this exercise as if I am speaking directly to you. Give yourself time to visualize all that is taking place.
“Father, you know the need for healing and forgiveness. I pray now that Your Spirit will comfort and heal this wounded heart and soul.”
“ Please close your eyes and visualize the scene where the abortion took place. Jesus quietly enters the room and you see that His eyes are filled with love for you. He takes off His coat and covers you. He touches your hand. With tenderness in His voice, He speaks softly that though He does not approve of the abortion, He loves you completely. Jesus goes on to say that He died on the cross to pay for what is taking place. He offers you a check signed in His blood and asks you to accept His payment and to forgive yourself.”
Recognizing that there is often anger toward others who are involved (a man who is not willing to accept responsibility for the child, a parent who is too ashamed to stand with his/ her daughter or son and forces the decision to have an abortion, or others who may have been involved in the decision) we must move on to forgiving others.
“There are others to forgive now. Please picture Jesus speaking to the person that hurt you, saying, ” I do not approve of what you have done to my child, but I paid for it on the cross.” Jesus turns to you and gives you another check signed with His blood, and asks you to accept the payment for what the other person did that hurt you. As an act of the will, now go to that person who hurt you so deeply and say, “What you have done hurt me, but because I have the payment of Jesus, I forgive you.”
“We are ready to go now. Jesus is walking with you. As He holds your hand and you walk away, stop and look back. The scene has totally changed. Instead of the hurt and pain you see the cross of Christ, and a carpet of His crimson blood. Jesus whispers to you that from now on, when you think of this event you will see the cross and the blood as a reminder that He paid for all your sin in full and you are now clean, restored, and forgiven.”
“As you and Jesus walk toward the rest of your life together, you see fields of flowers and the beauty of His creation. Jesus reminds you of how much He loves you, how special you are, and that He has a future and a plan filled with hope for your life. For the next few moments, I want you to enjoy the love and presence of Jesus who claims you as His own sister.”
“When you are comfortable, you may open your eyes to God’s beautiful today and your dreams of tomorrow.”
This is the beginning of the healing process. Full recovery involves affirming worth and internalizing that forgiveness has taken place. If needed, I am happy to guide anyone through this exercise and help provide the resources for healing after abortion.
We the church must face this issue. We live in a real world and cannot solve this problem with hate and violence. Our only choice is to offer hope and Godly counsel to those who are considering abortion. If it has already taken place, we are commanded by our Lord to offer His forgiveness, healing, and love.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Where is Your Faith
“Where is your faith?” That's a question Jesus asked his disciples when they were on the lake in the little boat as the storm raged. Jesus was asleep. Out of fear of drowning, they awakened him. Was their faith only good when the sea was calm? What about us? Do we trust God only when things are going our way? Is our faith based upon our situation? Do we chase after a religion that teaches, “If you have enough faith all your problems will disappear”?
Through years of pastoral counseling, I have come to the realization that our biggest problem is a lack of faith. We try to avoid difficult times. We seek to control our every situation believing that if we are in control, we are safe. Yet, our loving Father is allowing problems to teach us and help us grow.
When we commit ourselves to God, we say we want to become like Christ.
God sees where we are lacking in the Christ-like qualities, (Fruit of the Spirit), and puts us n the classroom necessary to develop those qualities. If we lack patience; tribulation! If we lack love; obnoxious people! If we lack faith; trying times. Faith means believing in the love and faithfulness of God that enables us to yield control of our lives, in every situation, to God. However, when push comes to shove, most of us have more trust in doctors than in God. When we have surgery, we sign a document giving permission that allows the doctor to perform the planned surgery and any other deemed necessary. When the storms arise and difficult times come, we want out! Surely a God of Love would not want His children to suffer. Yet Paul says if we are to know the power of His resurrection, we must experience the fellowship of His suffering.
Though Jesus spoke and the waves were stilled, His greater desire was for the disciples to understand His power and love so they would totally surrender their lives to Him. God wants us to “faith” him and live without complaining or murmuring. No harm can come unless God has a greater purpose in it. Can you relax and live within God’s purpose for your life because you “faith” Him completely? I am like the man who asked Jesus to heal his child. Jesus answered, “If you “faith.” The man answered, “I have a little faith, help my faith to grow.” May that be our prayer. I would appreciate your feed-back. Click on “comments” and fire away!
Through years of pastoral counseling, I have come to the realization that our biggest problem is a lack of faith. We try to avoid difficult times. We seek to control our every situation believing that if we are in control, we are safe. Yet, our loving Father is allowing problems to teach us and help us grow.
When we commit ourselves to God, we say we want to become like Christ.
God sees where we are lacking in the Christ-like qualities, (Fruit of the Spirit), and puts us n the classroom necessary to develop those qualities. If we lack patience; tribulation! If we lack love; obnoxious people! If we lack faith; trying times. Faith means believing in the love and faithfulness of God that enables us to yield control of our lives, in every situation, to God. However, when push comes to shove, most of us have more trust in doctors than in God. When we have surgery, we sign a document giving permission that allows the doctor to perform the planned surgery and any other deemed necessary. When the storms arise and difficult times come, we want out! Surely a God of Love would not want His children to suffer. Yet Paul says if we are to know the power of His resurrection, we must experience the fellowship of His suffering.
Though Jesus spoke and the waves were stilled, His greater desire was for the disciples to understand His power and love so they would totally surrender their lives to Him. God wants us to “faith” him and live without complaining or murmuring. No harm can come unless God has a greater purpose in it. Can you relax and live within God’s purpose for your life because you “faith” Him completely? I am like the man who asked Jesus to heal his child. Jesus answered, “If you “faith.” The man answered, “I have a little faith, help my faith to grow.” May that be our prayer. I would appreciate your feed-back. Click on “comments” and fire away!
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Mutual Relationships
Within 24 hours I read two statements, one from Bruce Larson and the other from Keith Miller, which said the heart of sin is a desire to be in control. Should this be a surprise since Satan’s temptation of Eve was, “You will not die. Your eyes will be opened and you will be like God.” Ever since then, people have sought control, over their lives and over the lives of others. We have lived under the curse.
Paul says “all who rely on observing the law, are under a curse.” We are to live by faith for he again says “The just shall live by faith.” Christ came to free us from the curse by being cursed for us. We live in freedom through faith. (Galatians 3:10-14)
Faith changes the way we relate to God and one another. Part of our trouble in understanding the faith walk is that there is no English verb faith. We have the noun and the verbal, but no verb. The Greek word is a verb that involves action. The Greek verb contains the following actions; belief, commitment, dependence, and expectations. I like to sum it up as “yielding control.”
We are to yield control to God for He is Creator, Sovereign, Lord, and Master. He has every right to be in control of our lives. Paul says the journey of sin begins with the failure to give God the glory due Him. Thus, we worship the created instead of the Creator. (Romans 1:21-23) We live by faith as we “yield control” to God.
Our relationships with others are to be marked by faith. Paul says “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” I call this the principal of mutual submission. He demonstrates the principal in three different relationships; husband/wife, parent/child, and employer/employee. We are to recognize one another as our equal. We are joint heirs with Christ. For me to control you is to believe I am “better than you,” “smarter than you.” And the list goes on. This is contrary to Paul’s advice to esteem others better than self.
On the human level fear prevails. There are some people who are not safe for me to be in relationship with. How can I know to what level I can trust? Please note, “mutual submission.” Anyone who is not willing to be submissive to another is not a safe relationship to enter into. They have what is sometimes referred to as “the messiah complex.” They are primarily interested in themselves. Selfish!
I hear “Someone has to take the lead.” There is a difference between leadership and dictatorship. Dictatorship come out of low self-esteem, looks down on the dictated, resents input from the dictated, makes decisions, and blames others when the decision is wrong. Leadership flows from a healthy self-esteem, looks upon the lead as worthy, delights in their input, makes decisions with the interest of all and if the decision is wrong takes responsibility.
I challenge you to walk by faith, developing healthy relationships by “faithing” God and one another.
Do you have questions? Do you agree or disagree? Please make comments at the bottom of this page. I long to dialogue with you concerning this subject.
Paul says “all who rely on observing the law, are under a curse.” We are to live by faith for he again says “The just shall live by faith.” Christ came to free us from the curse by being cursed for us. We live in freedom through faith. (Galatians 3:10-14)
Faith changes the way we relate to God and one another. Part of our trouble in understanding the faith walk is that there is no English verb faith. We have the noun and the verbal, but no verb. The Greek word is a verb that involves action. The Greek verb contains the following actions; belief, commitment, dependence, and expectations. I like to sum it up as “yielding control.”
We are to yield control to God for He is Creator, Sovereign, Lord, and Master. He has every right to be in control of our lives. Paul says the journey of sin begins with the failure to give God the glory due Him. Thus, we worship the created instead of the Creator. (Romans 1:21-23) We live by faith as we “yield control” to God.
Our relationships with others are to be marked by faith. Paul says “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” I call this the principal of mutual submission. He demonstrates the principal in three different relationships; husband/wife, parent/child, and employer/employee. We are to recognize one another as our equal. We are joint heirs with Christ. For me to control you is to believe I am “better than you,” “smarter than you.” And the list goes on. This is contrary to Paul’s advice to esteem others better than self.
On the human level fear prevails. There are some people who are not safe for me to be in relationship with. How can I know to what level I can trust? Please note, “mutual submission.” Anyone who is not willing to be submissive to another is not a safe relationship to enter into. They have what is sometimes referred to as “the messiah complex.” They are primarily interested in themselves. Selfish!
I hear “Someone has to take the lead.” There is a difference between leadership and dictatorship. Dictatorship come out of low self-esteem, looks down on the dictated, resents input from the dictated, makes decisions, and blames others when the decision is wrong. Leadership flows from a healthy self-esteem, looks upon the lead as worthy, delights in their input, makes decisions with the interest of all and if the decision is wrong takes responsibility.
I challenge you to walk by faith, developing healthy relationships by “faithing” God and one another.
Do you have questions? Do you agree or disagree? Please make comments at the bottom of this page. I long to dialogue with you concerning this subject.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Three is a Complete Number
In Judaism, the number three represents spiritual completion. Thus, the Trinity: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. I want to suggest three other "groups of three" that involve spiritual wholeness.
God loves me, so I can love myself enabling me to love you. Agape love, which begins with God, is unconditional. As we experience God's love, we are able to love ourselves for who we are in Christ. Through the indwelling presence of God, we are then empowered to love others as we love ourselves.
God forgives me, so I can forgive myself enabling me to forgive you. It is an awareness of the cost and how much I have been forgiven by God, that I am able to forgive others. I exchange what others owe me for what I owe God. (Matthew 6)
God is faithful, so I can have faith enabling me to faith you. "...the just shall live by faith." (Romans 1:17) For years I added the phrase, "faith in God alone." Then I realized that was not what the passage said. Our faith must be extended form the beginning point of "faith in God" to faith, belief and trust, in our fellow man. Our faith is all about relationships. faith in God allows us to be open to healthy relationships. John states the purpose of telling the Gospel story of Jesus is that we might have fellowship with one another. That fellowship is with the Father through our relationship with Jesus. (I John 1:1-5)
I challenge you to accept God's love, forgiveness, and faith and to let it flow through you to all other relationships.
What do you think? Do you have questions? I am here to continue the conversation.
God loves me, so I can love myself enabling me to love you. Agape love, which begins with God, is unconditional. As we experience God's love, we are able to love ourselves for who we are in Christ. Through the indwelling presence of God, we are then empowered to love others as we love ourselves.
God forgives me, so I can forgive myself enabling me to forgive you. It is an awareness of the cost and how much I have been forgiven by God, that I am able to forgive others. I exchange what others owe me for what I owe God. (Matthew 6)
God is faithful, so I can have faith enabling me to faith you. "...the just shall live by faith." (Romans 1:17) For years I added the phrase, "faith in God alone." Then I realized that was not what the passage said. Our faith must be extended form the beginning point of "faith in God" to faith, belief and trust, in our fellow man. Our faith is all about relationships. faith in God allows us to be open to healthy relationships. John states the purpose of telling the Gospel story of Jesus is that we might have fellowship with one another. That fellowship is with the Father through our relationship with Jesus. (I John 1:1-5)
I challenge you to accept God's love, forgiveness, and faith and to let it flow through you to all other relationships.
What do you think? Do you have questions? I am here to continue the conversation.
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